INTERVIEWS

Pastor Bolaji Idowu Shares One Mistake Most Pastors Make That’s Driving People Away from Church

Apr 13, 2023

“At the end of the day, as a minister, the ministry is not about you, and that’s the thing we always forget. It is about the people. Whatever message you have that cannot connect to help people, disciple them, take them to a deeper place, and help them solve their problems, the message is ineffective. So, the effectiveness of a pastor is about the effectiveness of the message.

When you read about the ministry of Jesus Christ, it is spoken about how effective he was as a minister. I think that sometimes the message is powerful but not relatable, and that can be the cause of the church’s problems. It’s heartbreaking. This is why I say people could have stayed at home, but they dressed up, spent money, bought fuel, which is a challenge, used their cash to come to church, and they meet someone who is ill-prepared. He doesn’t understand what to say nor has he heard anything from the Realms of the spirit and digested it into portions that are applicable to people. That’s a challenge for me.

I think that when people come to church, they really want to hear the voice of God. They want an encounter with the spirit of God, and that’s what the church should give them. Sometimes it’s just that “pastors become people blind.” It’s not that they don’t see the people, but you know when you deal with too much pain, you become insensitive to pain. That’s why some doctors may come across as mean.

So, what happens with the pastor is that sometimes the pastor is totally disconnected from what is going on. He forgets that the person who is struggling with his/her finances can just be a great Christian. He forgets that a great Christian can have real marital issues, and there can be two Christians who really love the Lord but who just find it difficult to stay together. There can be people who are really prayerful, but right now, they are suicidal and feel discouraged.

For some, it’s from their childhood — they were probably raped at the age of four, or they experienced some kind of abuse when they were younger. While they are adults now and their spirit is changed, they still deal with the trauma, the pain, and the effect of that on their soul.

You look at them, and you wonder why they can’t do a certain thing. That it feels normal and standard for you doesn’t mean it’s standard for somebody else. You just wonder why the person can’t date, but the problem is that she doesn’t know how to receive love — she doesn’t even love herself.

The other day I was teaching in church, and this lady had said she doesn’t love herself. Someone in the congregation responded that she shouldn’t talk like that in Jesus’ name. I then asked if that was the right response to someone saying she doesn’t like herself. Are you going to shut her down, or do you really want to help this lady and ask if she can help you understand her? You know what the church does, the church tries to solve problems that they do not understand. So, we end up confusing people more than when they came to us.